Why Spring Break Sucks

Aah, spring has sprung! If you live in the US, daylight savings time has managed to suck another precious hour of sleep away. The flowers are finally starting to bloom. The frost is off the ground. Mayflies and Junebugs are starting to creep out. Furnaces are shutting off, ice is thawing, and all you can think about is some fun in the sun. 

That's what you think when you're not a parent. When you're a parent and you hear "Spring Break" your stomach suddenly drops and your heart goes cold. To a parent Spring Break is just a week of hell. Either you get to dish out some serious moolah for some sort of day camp or you get to spend the next week at home. With the kids. All. Day. Long. And if you're really lucky it'll be raining or too cold to go outside to play. Or one of the kids will get sick and have to be inside for the week. Or your spouse will end up working while you stay home with the kids. All by yourself. Alone. With two children.

So you plan a trip to get the kids out of the house. But when you reach your destination you realize that you didn't plan well enough.
So you settle for the next best thing...
And realize you've been scammed out of $100 for less than an hour tour through a mediocre aquarium that was packed full of other idiot parents who didn't plan their family outing very well, either.

But hey...

Shelly the turtle
Sheldon the turtle